Helpful Suggestion or Harmful Criticism?

Years ago I learned something about myself that I try (sometimes successfully) to keep in mind.  When I talk with someone about plans they have or what they have done, I tend to focus on how they could improve it.  In my mind, I think I am suggesting how they can make something good even better.  Unfortunately, what they hear is criticism about what I think went wrong.  I’ve learned that people can hear my comments in the way that I intend if I begin by telling them what I appreciate about their work.  It’s best when I remember that the good quality of their efforts may not be as obvious to them as it is to me.  And I’ve learned that broad comments such as “You did a great job!” aren’t as meaningful as pointing specifics about what they did well.

I realized I still have a lot of work to do on this issue when I met with our student pastor recently to talk about a sermon he had preached.  He did an amazing job in so many ways, and the congregation members had nothing but good things to say about it.  But my brain automatically went to how his good sermon could have been even better.  I was surprised and saddened when I found out he had been dreading our conversation for that very reason.  I still have a lot of work to do in this department.

Unfortunately, I don’t think I’m alone in this endeavor.  Our church’s theme is “Encourage one another and build each other up,” but too often we discourage one another and tear each other down.  I know about comments that I believe people made with the best of intentions, but stung the recipient.  Some of the faithful servants in our church have confided in me about the criticisms they have received about their work, which sometimes even led them to question if they should continue in their labors.  I know of others in our congregation who choose not to get involved in the work of the church for fear that someone will criticize what they are doing.

Perhaps sometimes you may believe that a fellow church member is hurting our congregation by what they are doing.  If so, please put thought into how you can express your concern in a way that honors the value and worth of that person.

Other times, you have an idea about how their service in our church could improve.  Your thoughts may be exactly what we need to hear.  When you voice them, however, please be sure first to tell the person that you appreciate their efforts, and give specific examples.  Your words will more likely then be heard as an encouraging suggestion, rather than a discouraging put-down.

God often speaks to us through the voice of others.  You have the amazing opportunity to remind fellow members of your church family about the Lord’s great love for them, and the pleasure he finds in what they in his name, and the devotion they express in their service.  Your words of encouragement may be exactly what a struggling brother or sister needs to hear.

Are You an Ox or a Sheep?

Are you an ox or a sheep?  People in ancient times knew a lot about both of these critters, but these days they’re not as familiar to most of us.  However, they offer two different ways to understanding who we are, and how we can relate to God.

Sheep are led and fed; the shepherd guides and cares for them.  In return, they provide fleece, which becomes good sturdy and warm woolen clothing.  The sheep grow their wool without any effort and stress.  They simply go about their merry way under the care of the shepherd, and the wool comes naturally.  Research shows that sheep who are well fed and cared-for produce superior fleece.  And the sheep do it without any work of skill of their own.  It’s all up to the one who takes care of them.

Today’s dairy cattle live similarly to the sheep of ancient times.  The farmer monitors and manages their feed and living conditions, and the cows produce their milk naturally.  Good milk production comes not from the cows’ efforts or exertion, but from what the farmer does to care for them.

Oxen, on the other hand, are whipped and worked.  In the olden days, the ox was everyone’s powerhouse: pulling the plow, threshing the grain, powering the mill.  The ox driver pushed them to strain themselves and give their maximum effort to be productive.  Any rest the oxen received was simply so they could be more effective for their labor the next day.  The oxen endured difficult lives of hard work.  There were no green pastures for them; only the yoke and the stall.  The Bible frequently mentions the ox yoke as a symbol of oppression and punishment (for example, Exodus 6:6-7, 1 Kings 12:13-14, Jeremiah 27-28, and Galatians 5:1).

Scripture tells us that Jesus is our Good Shepherd (John 10:11), and we are sheep of his pasture (Psalm 100:3).  God did not intend for us to live like oxen; such an existence came from a life lived far away from him and his good plan for us all.

When we recognize God’s love and power in our lives, it is normal and healthy for us to want to respond by giving him our very best.  But the Lord is our shepherd (Psalm 23:1),who makes us lie down in green pastures and leads us to still waters.  He is not our harsh ox driver, driving us with whips and goads. The more closely we follow him and receive what he offers for us, the more fulfilling and blessed our lives become.  And what we offer to him in return flows as naturally from who we are as fleece grows on a sheep. 

God leads and feeds us.  As we follow him and receive what he offers, what we offer to him in return flows naturally from our lives.  Our service and devotion to him is not compelled with harsh discipline; it is rather an effortless response that flows from within.  For this reason, we discover joy instead of drudgery when we follow God’s leading, whether it is to care for those in need, express our faith to the curious, or act for justice.

Are You a Zombie or a Spirit?

As most people within screaming distance of Evans City know, zombie horror began in our area with George Romero’s movie “Night of the Living Dead.”  So as Halloween approaches, I have a question for you: would you rather be a zombie or a spirit?

Christians celebrate the new life that we know in Jesus Christ.  But in order to enter the new life of his resurrection, we must first die to the old life we once knew.  As Paul wrote to the Romans, “We were buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may live a new life” (Romans 6:4).  Paul goes on to describe how the death of our old life frees us from sin, which now no longer has control over us.

And yet we choose to live like zombies clawing their way out of the grave.  The problem with zombies is that they don’t know they are dead.  They stagger around with outstretched arms and soulless groans, trying to live a life they no longer have.  In the same way, we cling to what we used to have and what we used to be.  We seek fulfillment and enjoyment from the activities and interests that we had before we died with Christ.  And like zombies that can’t get enough flesh to eat, we are never satisfied.

Zombie Christians orient themselves to the pursuits of the old life.  Instead of realizing that they are dead, they believe that they must continue to live as they had before.  The only difference is that as Christians they try to restrict themselves from the excesses of the old life by putting up barriers and following “thou shalt nots.”  They ask “What can I keep from my old life and still be a Christian?” in the same way that zombies try to hold onto what few faculties they have that have survived the grave.

God did not put us to death with Christ in order for us to be zombies.  He took away our old lives because they were destroying us, and because they would never allow us to experience the joy, peace, and meaning that he desires for us.  The sooner we stop trying to live a life that we no longer have, the sooner we will enjoy the new life that Christ has given us.  God’s blessings come to us not as some sort of restricted or whitewashed version of the old life, but through an entirely new existence that basks in his love.

God has given us a new life by filling us with his Spirit, his very presence to empower us, to guide us, and to show us at all times that he is with us, and that he takes great pleasure in us.  The life of the Spirit opens us to possibilities that could not be possible of even conceivable before we died.  The always-new, always-amazing presence of God awakens in us the very essence of our humanity, and we discover for the first time who we really are.

So I’ll ask you again.  This Halloween, and for the rest of your life, do you want to be a zombie, or live in the Spirit?

More Than a Glass of Water in the Desert

Usually our church’s summer mission trips focus on giving aid to people who have gone through a natural disaster: tornadoes, floods, and hurricanes.  Last month, although we travelled to West Virginia to assist flood victims, our efforts were directed more to people struggling to get by in situations of poverty.  For example, Michelle, who owns the home where I worked, is a single mother who is unable to work, trying to get by on disability checks and what extra money she can earn breeding pedigree dogs.  She is a giver, not a taker, helping neighbors “with money I don’t have” with their own struggles.

It’s one thing to help people going through a crisis, to help them get back on their feet.  But how can we best help people like Michelle, or the residents of the Montana Indian reservation we visited on our first mission trip?  They greatly appreciated our efforts, and Michelle now has a dry, insulated room ready for the winter.  She is grateful for that blessing, but her overall situation still has not changed.  She will still struggle to pay her bills, or decide what necessities she can do without.  She still lives in a community with no jobs, even if she was able to work.  She will still have to wrestle with the dark emotions that rise up from living in a seemingly hopeless situation. 

Our week with her brought a ray of sunshine into her darkness, and we improved her living conditions a bit.  Or as we say here at Old Union, we encouraged her and built her up.  But how much of a difference did we make for her overall?  Did we give a glass of water to someone in the desert, but leave her in the blazing heat?  Did we pull someone out of a ditch, but leave her stranded on the side of the road?

Jesus told a story about a Samaritan who gave aid to someone who had been beaten and left for dead (Luke 10).  As he tells the tale, “when he saw him, he took pity on him.  He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine.”  The Samaritan helped the man, but he was still weak and wounded, unable to fend for himself.  So he put the man on his donkey, took him to an inn, and took care of him.  He then paid the innkeeper to continue to care for the man until he was fully healed.  The Samaritan was not satisfied with half-way measures.  He continued to encourage and build up the man until he was restored to full health and strength.

I wonder if at times we are satisfied with half-way measures of our own.  We fix someone’s house without addressing the causes of her poverty.  We give school supplies to children in need, but do little to help them and their families be able to care for themselves.  Half-way measures feel good, because we see immediate results.  We can be the knights in shining armor, helping them in their distress.  We pat ourselves on the back, pleased with the encouragement and up-building we have done.  But the sources of their struggles remains.

How can we be more like the Good Samaritan in the encouragement we give?  I don’t know, but I hope that together we can look for some answers.

Cause and Effect?

Events happen because something causes them.  Your toe hurts because you smacked it into the door jam.  You’re tired because you stayed up too late the night before.  It’s dark at night because the sun sets.  We may argue about the causes of what we experience (is human activity responsible for climate change? have government regulations killed the coal industry?).  And we may not know what the causes are (why do people get cancer?  what started World War I?).  But we all agree that our world operates under the rule of cause and effect.

Philosophers of religion sometimes refer to God as the “First Cause.”  He ultimately is the cause of everything that happens.  The circumstance that causes one event was itself caused by something else, and so on down the line until we reach God himself as the First Cause.  For example, someone’s house collapses because of an earthquake.  The earthquake occurred because tectonic plates under the earth’s surface grind against each other.  The plates move because of the earth’s structure.  The earth is structured the way it is because…. Eventually we reach the first cause: “because of God.”  And God has no cause.  He is the one who causes everything else.

Lately, however, I’ve been wondering if the rule of cause and effect actually runs the world.  What if some things happen for no reason and with no cause?  For example, medical researchers have not been able to find the cause for some diseases.  Because we believe in cause and effect, we assume that there is a cause, and we hope that more research will find it.  But is that always the case?  Could it be that sometimes when we ask “Why did this happen?” there is simply no reason why?  Not that we can’t figure out or understand why it happened, but that there simply is no cause for it at all.

Unbelievers may chalk such events up to dumb luck or random fate.  Sometimes things just happen, they may say.  Life is one giant coin toss: sometimes you come out heads, and other times for no reason at all you end up with tails.

But as believers, we acknowledge that we are under the control of God’s providential care.  He does not need a reason, or a cause, to do what he does.  Job and his friends spent 35 chapters debating the cause for his affliction.  When God finally spoke, he did not provide a reason or a cause for what happened to Job.  He described his power and his control over the most powerful and the most insignificant happenings in creation.  In essence, he asked Job, “Who are you that you should expect an explanation from me?”  Sometimes, we do not know the cause for what happened because there is none.  There is only the will of God.

In his letter to the Romans, Paul considers the question of God’s justice when he blesses one person instead of another.  He does not explain that the person deserved what they got, or even that there is a purpose beyond human understanding.  He concludes that God’s will needs no reason or explanation: “God has mercy on whom he wants to have mercy, and he hardens whom he wants to harden” (Romans 9:18).

God has blessed us with inquisitive minds and the desire to understand.  But at times, we submit to God’s authority by relinquishing the notion that our actions, or events in God’s creation, can explain what happens to us.  God needs no cause or reason for what he does.

A Requiem for Reasonable Discourse

I avoid posting politically-oriented thoughts on Facebook or my blog.  Experience has taught me that they only create anger among those who disagree, and further entrench convictions held by those who may agree.  No one is enlightened, and everyone simply gains more fodder for their own diatribes.  However, I am going to dip my toes into the water and hope the piranhas don’t devour them.  I’m not expressing support or disapproval about a particular issue, but registering my dismay about what has happened to our nation’s political process.

Today I pulled up notes from a sermon I preached in August 2001, hoping to glean some pearls I might be able to use on Sunday.  While making the point that adversaries may be able to respect and even cooperate with each other, I said “You would think the Democrats and Republicans would want to rip each other apart.  Some countries make that mistake, when they believe that political parties should attack each other at any cost.  Republicans and Democrats may disagree strongly, but they share a common loyalty to the Constitution and to our nation.  When push comes to shove, they work together.  They have different goals and strategies, but they are on the same team.”  Perhaps I was naïve sixteen years ago, but these remarks certainly don’t describe politics in the United States today.  The primary objective of our elected officials has become the ascension of their party over the other.  The welfare of our nation and its people, and respect for the Constitution, have taken a back seat.  At best, they have become talking points put to the service of partisan agendas.

I miss the good old days when we expected our elected officials act with respect and honesty.  Do you remember when a President could face impeachment for lying?  Or the shock we felt when a Vice President told a senator of the other party to “Go f--- yourself”?  At the time, episodes like these seemed to have hit the gutter of partisan politics.  Now, they would barely last a news cycle.  American governance has become a zero-sum game: in order for “my” team to win, the “other” team must lose.  The definition of winning in Washington has become the defeat or embarrassment of the other party.  The deliberative process has lost its give and take.  The goal is to do all of the taking and none of the giving.  The concept that the best result comes from both parties working together is now dismissed as a quaint notion.

If you doubt the hypocrisy that both parties demonstrate, go back eight years when the Democrats had the White House and majorities in both houses of Congress.  The Democrats are now saying what the Republicans did then, and the Republicans are repeating what the Democrats did then.  The majority party blames the minority party for being obstructionist, and the minority party protests that the majority is forcing their agenda upon the nation.  It is not the issues that matter, but who holds the power.

If you are inclined to comment on this post by arguing that the “other” party is to blame for the decline and fall of American governance, take care.  Your comment may simply become one more example of how partisanship has trumped reasoned discourse.  And as the originator of this post, I reserve the right to remove insulting or profane comments. 

Now, let’s see if I can survive those piranhas….

Grab a Big Handful of Grace

Last month we celebrated communion by intinction, fondly known also as “rip and dip” at my church.  As the pastor, I hold the bread, with elders holding chalices on both sides.  Congregation members come forward to “rip” a piece off the loaf and “dip” it in the juice before returning to their seats.  Most people take a small piece of bread from the loaf: little more than what they can pinch between two fingers.  Every now and then someone ends up with a bigger-than-expected piece because the bread rips in an unusual way.  When this happens, they usually look up at me with an embarrassed expression, as if to apologize for taking so much.

Not Jacob.  I can see the gleam of excitement in his eye even before he steps up with a smile to take a big handful of bread from the loaf.  His mother, grandmother, aunt, or whoever is with him may wince a bit and look at me to confirm that I understand the situation and won’t take offense.

Jacob is an adult member of our congregation who has Downs Syndrome.  His smile and cheerful greetings, and his eagerness to lend a hand at church events, display how God works through Jacob in wonderful ways.  And he teaches us by how he takes communion to enjoy God’s blessings more than we typically do.

God does not want us to be content with tiny morsels of grace in our lives.  He wants us to grab onto all that he offers with joyful gusto.  We do not need to worry that we’ll use up all the bread or that the cup will run dry.  Remember: he is the One who fed a crowd with five loaves and two fish.  If the Lord had felt the need to be careful with how much he gave, perhaps the 5,000 would have gotten only enough food to keep their stomachs from growling until they got home.  But not Jesus!  Not only did everyone have plenty to eat, but they ended up with twelve baskets of leftovers (Matthew 14:15-21)!

During our church’s mission trips each year, I joke that God is a terrible accountant, because it never makes sense how much money we have left over at the end.  One year our finance committee chair wondered if we had spent any money at all after we returned what we hadn’t spent.  This year’s trip will cost significantly more than trips in previous years, but it is already fully funded.  God has displayed his generosity once again.

We may worry at my church about the mortgage we still owe on our new building.  And we may be anxious about how to pay for the extensive roof repair work that we need.  But God is unconcerned.  As you’ll read in this newsletter, he has arranged through the generosity of an anonymous donor to have our entire parking lot paved!

Take a clue from Jacob.  When the Lord offers a blessing, do not be content with a tiny morsel, to make sure there’s enough to go around.  Grab a giant handful of what God offers, trusting in what one scholar has called Jesus’ “logic of superabundance.”

Elemental Spirituality

Scientists have identified 118 elements that make up all matter.  The ancients had it easy: they believed there were only four: earth, fire, wind, and water.  Different combinations of these elements, they thought, compose everything that exists.  And because they didn’t separate the studies of science and religious belief, as we tend to do today, their relationship with God, described best by considering them as aspects of these four basic building blocks of creation.  Although our understanding of the physical world has developed far beyond that of these people from the past, we can continue to benefit from the wisdom they developed by considering God’s work through the four elements. 

EARTH: We still talk about being well “grounded,” or having a stable basis for our lives and what we do.  We call someone “down to earth” if they are well-connected with the practical aspects of life.  In the Bible, the psalmist praises God by declaring, “My feet stand on level ground; in the great congregation I will praise the Lord” (Psalm 26:12).  On the other hand, as he puts it, “You place [the wicked] on slippery ground; you cast them down to ruin” (Psalm 73:18).

How does God enable you to remain grounded in the everyday aspects of your life?

FIRE: We describe someone as being “on fire” when they are doing an exceptional, amazing job at whatever task they are doing.  The “fire” of God captures, electrifies, and excites us.  In Scripture, God used fire to speak to his people (Exodus 3:2) and guide them (Exodus 13:21).  When the Lord’s very Spirit came upon his people as “tongues of fire” on Pentecost, they were so filled with his power that in day the church grew from 120 people to over 3,000!

When has God filled you with the “fire” of his presence and power?

WIND: When life has become stagnant and empty, it’s good to have a “breath of fresh air.”  Like the wind, God brings newness and life in powerful but unseen ways.  As Jesus once said, “The wind blows wherever it pleases. You hear its sound, but you cannot tell where it comes from or where it is going. So it is with everyone born of the Spirit” (John 3:8)

How has God brought fresh new life to you, in powerful and unseen ways?

WATER: Just as water nourishes the thirsty ground, God’s presence rejuvenates us and  brings us to life.  The Bible ends with a description of the “river of the water of life”  that brings healing and nourishment (Revelation 22:1-2).  Just as water washes away dirt and stains, God removes all our guilt and shame.  The sacrament of baptism expresses this cleansing power in our lives, as the author of Hebrews encourages us to “draw near to God with a sincere heart and with the full assurance that faith brings, having our hearts sprinkled to cleanse us from a guilty conscience and having our bodies washed with pure water” (Hebrews 10:22).

What “dryness” in your life can God refresh?  What “stain” can he wash away?

When Opposites Don't Attract

WHEN OPPOSITES DON’T ATTRACT

As we become more aware of the diversity in our world, we also seem to be less tolerant of the effects of this diversity.  I speak here not about diversity of ethnicity, religion, or socio-economic status, but about diversity of opinion and conviction.  Politically, socially, and culturally, our nation has devolved into a world of “us” versus “them,” with a growing gap between the two.  This gap tends to be the genesis for all sorts of conflict, but it also offers possibilities for innovation and creativity.  It depends on how we handle the opposites we find among us, and I see four options.

First, the simplest way to deal with opposites is to consider them as incompatibles.  You can either have one or the other, but not both.  This is the “either/or” outlook.  You can have A or you can have B, but you can’t have both.  Either/or is the simplest way to consider opposites, and it’s most attractive to zealots.  In the original sense of the word, a Zealot could imagine either a Judea dominated by Rome, or one that was completely independent and self-determining.  Anyone who tried to merge the two was a traitorous collaborator, worthy of more hatred and disgust than even the brutal legionnaires.  And we find their modern counterparts all around us.  In the dark days of the Cold War, a nation was either pro-Soviet or pro-US.  You had to choose one side or the other, and you certainly couldn’t choose both.  If you tried to be “non-aligned” country, both sides distrusted and rejected you.  You can either have a Republican President or a Democratic President.  The Tea Party movement exemplifies this philosophy well.  Small government, diminished regulation, and lower taxes are the holy grail.  You’re a traitor to the cause if you back down from or seek to find any nuance in the gospel according to Grover Norquist.  Please don’t misunderstand my example to imply that either/or is the provenance of one side of the political spectrum; you can find examples on the left as well.

Second, if you become disillusioned or dissatisfied with either/or,  you can compromise.  For years, I considered this to be the best way to deal with disputes between opposites, and my heroes were great compromisers like Daniel Webster and Henry Clay.  When people disagree, the best thing to do is to split things down the middle and give a little bit to each side.  No one is particularly happy about the result, but everyone (or at least, everyone who is reasonable) can grudgingly accept the result.  But the beauty of compromise is also its downfall.  No one is happy, and no one can exult in the outcome, other than to celebrate that neither side has slaughtered the other.  Compromise dulls and deadens; it does not inspire or invigorate.  Compromise leads to counting slaves to be three-fifths of a person, a conclusion that concluded nothing but merely set the stage for a fratricidal conflict four score and seven years later.  Compromise is the solution Solomon offered for two women claiming one baby, which would have brought about the wholly unsatisfactory result of each possessing half of a tiny corpse.

In time, I discovered the wonder of a third option for handling incompatibles: the Hegelian dialect, which replaces compromise with evocative possibility.  As thesis and antithesis interact, they create synthesis: a new way of thinking and being that had never existed before.  Unlike either/or, it requires thoughtful consideration and even acceptance of both opposites.  Unlike compromise, it creates and offers a solution for which all parties can be passionate.  The dialectic approach requires a great deal of imagination and creativity, together with openness to things never before conceived.  As you may be able to tell, I’m quite taken by power of the dialectic.  But I’m learning more about another, potentially more productive, strategy to approach incompatibles.

In this fourth way of thinking, the opposites are no longer incompatibles between which one must triumph over the other, nor two positions leading to a dissatisfying compromise, nor even a synthesis which replaces them both.  Let’s use the language of church leadership experts Roy Oswald and Barry Johnson and call them polarities.  In this schema, the opposites interact with each other not simply to produce a synthesis that is better than either of the originals, but to allow full expression for each.  Oswald and Johnson call it an infinity loop between two poles.  Movement toward one pole enables us to experience the full benefits that come from it.  But staying at that pole will lead to problems, which movement toward the other pole can overcome.  The goal is not to find some midpoint between the poles (that would be compromise), or to discern a new perspective that gleans from each pole (that would be something like dialectic), but fully embracing both and enjoying what comes from the interaction and tension between the two.

G.K. Chesterton’s 1908 book Orthodoxy offers an outlook similar to Oswald and Johnson’s description of polarities.  As he puts it, the point is not to find a balance between virtues, but to have them collide with each other.  He advocates holding passionately, uncompromisingly to both opposites.  Separate them, exaggerate them, and then crash them into each other.  To explain, he offers the example of courage, which he defines as “a strong desire to live taking the form of a readiness to die.”  If all you care about is living, you will run away from danger and hide from every threat.  But if all you care about is dying, then suicide is awfully attractive.  Courage is the collision of valuing life so much that you are willing to lose your life for it.  Is this the same thing as Oswald and Johnson’s polarities?  I’m not sure, but at the very least they’re kissing cousins.

Polarity, or the collision of opposites, provides intriguing insight into some of the toughest theological nuts we have to crack.  Looking again to Chesterton, he considers Isaiah 11’s prophecy of the lion laying down with the lamb.  The prophecy does not mean that the lion becomes lamb-like.  The lion would then be subdued by the lamb, which is just as much of an either/or as the lion eating the lamb would be.  The prophecy is not that the lion becomes a lamb, but that the two opposites can lie down together.  They can be with each other, both fully living out their identity.

This metaphor of lions and lambs is not limited to an ancient prophecy; it is a description of our Lord.  In Revelation 5, John is told to turn and look at the triumphant Lion of Judah, but when he turns he sees a Lamb that has been slain.  Is Jesus the gentle, humble, sacrificial lamb?  Yes.  Is Jesus the roaring, fierce, powerful lion?  Yes.  No either/or.  No compromise.  Not even a synthesis.  But a polarity.  Two simultaneous virtues crashing into each other.  And this opens us to the mystery of God.

• Do we worship one God? Yes.  Do we worship three Persons? Yes.
• Does a loving, sovereign God control the events of the world? Yes.  Are there terrible evils in this world that violate God’s will? Yes.
•  Does God love us with an infinite, unimaginable love that nothing can shatter? Yes.  Does God hate our sin with an unspeakable fury? Yes.
• Is Jesus God?  Yes.  Is Jesus human?  Yes.
• Is the kingdom of God here? Yes.  Will the kingdom come with the return of Christ? Yes.
•  Is the redeeming work of Christ the only means for salvation? Yes.  Does God desire for all people to be saved? Yes.

You may quibble with some of these opposites and point out that they are or can be quite compatible with each other.  And you may be correct.  But the number of foundational convictions that Christians hold which are, or at least seem to be, in contradiction with each other is certainly something to give us pause, and is a great supply of grist for the mill of apologetics.  It is certainly not the expression of a straightforward description of life, God, and the world.  Our faith cannot be confined to a discreet set of theological propositions, although much benefit comes from the centuries of inquiry and consideration.  If Christianity is a riddle, it is one that will never fully be solved.  Rather, it is an evocative and eternal mystery in which we revel and lose ourselves.

Each of these four strategies for handling oppositional elements can be appropriate in the correct context.   Some things are either/or, with no room for compromise.  Other matters can be settled satisfactorily with compromise, while others set the stage for a synthesis, and yet others form a dynamic polarity.  The trick, of course, is to match the most fitting approach for the matter at hand.

God Doesn't Care About Your Facebook Status

I walk into a hospital room to visit someone who just went through major surgery and say, “Hi!  How are you?”  Reflexively, he responds, “Fine, thanks,” regardless of much pain he is in or how worried he is about his prognosis. 

I hug someone at the funeral home as she stands grief-stricken beside the casket and ask, “How are you doing?”  Choking back her tears, she replies, “Good, and you?”

I see a social media post from a family that I know is going through a crisis.  It’s a picture of smiling, happy faces with the caption “Life doesn’t get any better than this!”

Almost instinctively, we try to put on a good appearance.  We want the world to think that our lives are happy and beautiful, no matter what struggles we may be enduring.  Maybe we’re afraid that others will reject us or think less of us if they know about our troubles.  We might think it’s a sign of weakness to admit to any problems.  Perhaps by disguising our difficulties we don’t have to admit to ourselves that we have them.  Then we can blissfully ignore them, hoping somehow we can muddle through life anyway.

God wants so much more for us than a happy façade over a troubled life, or a cheerful smile that masks a breaking heart.  Consider, for example, how the Bible presents its main characters.  Moses is a murderer.  David is a philanderer.  Elijah is a coward.  Jeremiah is a chronic complainer.  Peter is an unreliable loud-mouth.  Paul is a self-righteous jerk.  These aren’t heroes to idolize.  These aren’t sanitized saints to admire.  These are real people, with all their faults, sins, doubts, and emotions on full display.  The Bible does not give us a pantheon of role models; it shows God working with real people.

God sees us for who we really are, and not for the cleaned-up version we want to show to world.  We cannot bring our brokenness to him for healing and comfort if we try to hide it from him.  We cannot experience the fullness of his powerful love when we believe he will only love the positive parts of who we are.  Our good news is that God accepts, welcomes, and enjoys our whole being without reservation.

Consider how God presented himself to us through Jesus Christ.  He shared our lives at their most vulnerable points.  He was born in a strange place far from home and had enemies from the very start.  He grew up in an impoverished region with an unremarkable family.  He had no formal education or wealth.  He was tortured to death while being humiliated to all passers-by, while his closest friends deserted him.

If God wanted to win our devotion by impressing us, he went about it all wrong.  But if he had, we would think that we had to measure up to his standards. He would accept us only if we were as good as him.  But God is not seeking people who are perfect.  He seeks us in our sin, our weakness, our bad days.  Because it then that he can demonstrate the fullness of his love and grace.

Finding Contentment

How can you find happiness and contentment?  In one way or another, seeking the answer to this question guides and motivates many of our lives.  But the answer continues to elude us.

According to an article I recently read by Rev. Dr. Martin Theilen, psychologist have found that genetics account for about 50% of our ability to be content, our life circumstances for another 10%, and factors that we can control account for 40%.  We may think we’d be happier if we lived under different circumstances, but our attitudes and behaviors are four times more important for attaining the goal of a contented life.

Dr. Theilen points out ten Biblically-based attitudes and behaviors that help to increase our sense of contentment:

1. Knowing that external circumstances do not determine happiness: What good is it for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? (Mark 8:36)

2. Using trials as growth opportunities: We also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance;  perseverance, character; and character, hope. (Romans 5:3-4)

3. Cultivating optimism: Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (Philippians 4:8)

4. Focusing on the present: Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. (Matthew 6:34)

5. Practicing forgiveness: Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (Ephesians 4:32)

6. Practicing generosity: A generous person will prosper; whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. (Proverbs 11:25

7. Nurturing relationships: Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: if either of them falls down, one can help the other up.  But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)

8. Expressing gratitude: Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 5:18)

9. Caring for our bodies: Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? (1 Corinthians 6:19

10. Caring for our souls: “my soul finds rest in God; my salvation comes from him. (Psalm 62:1)

Consider how you can find contentment in your life through the practice of our faith in these ways.

Learning from Atheists

WHAT WE CAN LEARN FROM THE ATHEISTS

Atheists can teach us many things about our belief in God.  During my PhD studies I took a seminar called “Science and Religion,” in which our professor would bring up a religious topic and ask, “Why would anyone in their right mind believe this?”  Psalms 14 and 53 may both begin “The fool says in his heart, ‘There is no God,’” but for Dr. Grünbaum, “The fool says in his heart, ‘There is a God.’”  I deeply appreciate the challenges to my faith that he presented, because they forced me to consider what I believe, and why.  I came away from the seminar with a better understanding of what I had previously accepted without reflection.

A couple years ago I came across a collection of quotes by famous people who are atheists.  Just as my seminar challenged my faith and helped it to grow, their words can give us food for reflection and thought.

Sir Richard Branson, a British entrepreneur and founder of the Virgin Group, once said, “I would love to believe.  It’s very comforting to believe.”  I think we would all agree that faith in God can be very comforting.  We can be reassured with the knowledge that the  all-mighty & all-loving One has us in the cradle of his arms.  But if that’s all that our faith is about, we are missing something.  God is not a cosmic security blanket to make us feel good and to heal our boo-boos.  God makes us uncomfortable and challenges us to turn our lives upside-down.  He demands that we quit running our lives on our own terms, and to surrender authority of ourselves to him.  Suddenly, believing is not quite as comforting.

Brian Eno, a composer and performer of ambient music, wrote “What religion says to you, essentially, is that you’re not in control.  Now that’s a very liberating idea.  It’s quite a frightening idea as well, in some ways.”  And he’s right.  Our knowledge that God is in charge sets us free from the anxiety of trying to manage all the affairs of our lives.  We can release the sense of responsibility for making sure everything is taken care of.  On the other hand, the thought of letting go of our lives terrifies us.  What if we trust God and he lets us down?  And when we do surrender ourselves to him, we still want to second-guess what he does and we try to “help” him.  We easily forget the words that Moses spoke to the Israelites, fresh out of slavery, as the Egyptian army bore down upon them, with their backs to the Red Sea: “The Lord will fight for you; you need only to be still” (Exodus 14:14).

Hugh Laurie, the actor best known for playing the lead role in the TV series “House,” has said , “I have this idea that if there were a God, if he saw you taking anything for granted, he’d take it away.”  While we may disagree with his harsh notion of a God who goes around taking things away from us, imagine for a moment if he did what Mr. Laurie suggests.  I wonder how much would be left after God removed all that we take for granted.  God’s blessings are not like cheese doodles that we mindlessly stuff into our mouths while watching TV.  Each is a precious gift to savor, relish, and enjoy.

Comedian Kathy Griffin shocked the nation when she accepted an Emmy Award in 2007 by saying, “A lot of people come up here and they thank Jesus for this award.  I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus.  He didn’t help me a bit.”  While we may not be able to take her words to heart, they offer a warning for us.  Even when we say that we believe in God, we may share her attitude without realizing it.  We often take full credit for our accomplishments.  We can take satisfaction and even have appropriate pride in what we achieve.  But we easily forget that the Lord is the one who supplies the energy, skill, and wisdom we used to do so.  We overlook the many factors beyond our control or even awareness that he guides.

Isaac Asimov, one of the greatest science fiction writers, wrote “If I were not an atheist, I would believe in a God who prefers an honest and righteous atheist to a TV preacher whose every word is God, God, God, and whose every deed is foul, foul, foul.”  Even though Romans 10:9 tells us to declare with our mouths that Jesus is Lord, Jesus ended the Sermon on the Mount by telling us that not everyone who says “Lord, Lord” will enter the kingdom of heaven (Matthew 7:21).  Our witness to the world suffers greatly from the hypocritical words that come from mouths of Christians.  While we are considering words of atheists, let them consider not what we say but what we do.

Encouragement Is Not Sympathy

According to 1 Thessalonians 5:11, God calls us to “encourage one another and build each other up.” Παρακαλέω, the Greek word for encouraging, also means comforting or urging.  Encouragement is not simply about making someone feel better.  Encouragement invites people into a way of life and a way of thinking that enables us to experience the fullness of God’s blessings.

Encouragement is not sympathy.  Encouragement strengthens and invigorates.  It offers power and confidence.  Sympathy, however, seeks to lessen the harshness of our struggles.  It tells us, “What you are experiencing is too much for you to handle.  Your life is too difficult.”  Much like pity, it weakens us with the message that we are incapable of dealing with the life God has given us. 

Sympathy cuts us off from the Lord.  It limits our grasp of his capabilities, until he becomes nothing more than the One who cares and holds our hands.  But encouragement draws us closer to God.  It urges us to One who fills us with His power to handle anything that we face. It tells us that with God, all things are possible and no situations are God-forsaken.  Sympathy says “What a shame!”  Encouragement says “Get ready for something amazing!”

Years ago I met a man with chronic physical ailments.  His wife sympathized for him.  She tended to his every need.  As he lay groaning on the hospital bed in their living room, she did whatever she could do to ease his struggles.  Each day he got weaker and weaker, and eventually went to a residential therapy center.

The therapists did not sympathize with this man; they encouraged him.  With caring and with firmness, they pushed him to do what he never thought he would ever be able to do again.  When he complained, they urged him to do the best that he could.  Over time he became stronger and stronger, until he was able to walk again and care for himself.

The man returned home, where his sympathetic wife once again cared for his every need.  When he faced a struggle, she took care of it for him.  The more she did, the less he did and became weaker and weaker.  Before long, he found himself back in the hospital bed again.  As well-meaning as his wife was, her sympathy took away his strength.

When God tells us to encourage one another, he wants us to act like the therapists, not the wife.

God in the Crowd

We seek God in various ways and places.  I, like many people, get in touch with God in the natural world.  I often sense his presence in the night sky, and I feel close to him when I’m out in the woods or on the creek.

But there is a better way to meet God.  Not in the beauty of nature, but through other people.

The Bible begins with a tale of a man enjoying fellowship with God in a beautiful garden called Eden.  But the story of Scripture moves us out of the garden and takes us on a journey to our ultimate destination.  At the very end of the book, Revelation does not offer the promise of a return to Eden, but the vision of a city (Revelation 21-22).  The new paradise that Christ is preparing for us is not about sunsets and waterfalls.  It is about streets and gates and walls and people…lots of people.  For all eternity, we will see the glory of God in the midst of a crowd.

We do not find God primarily in a rainbow or a hawk’s flight, because they were not made in his image.  That honor belongs to humanity alone (Genesis 1:26).  We discover God as we encounter his image in one another.  We may, with the psalmist, proclaim that “the heavens declare the glory of God” (Psalm 19:1).  But nothing compares with the glory of God that we see in another person.  None of us, to be sure, are a perfect and complete image of God, but we each possess a unique reflection of his glory.  Every person we encounter provides us with a new aspect of the God whom we seek.  If you want to find God, look for him in people, not towering oaks or ocean waves.

Not only are we made in God’s image, but he is present in the world through us.  As the apostle Paul wrote, “You are the body of Christ, and each one of you is a part of it” (1 Corinthians 12:27).  The message once again is clear: we find God in people.  He touches us and speaks to us in the ordinary messiness of human relationships, more so than in the stars and the wind.

We may resist the truth of finding God in others in part because human relationships can be difficult.  People will disagree with us, anger and hurt us, and fail us.  They intrude into our lives with demands and expectations that can frustrate us.  And it is exactly in these inconveniences that we meet God.  Left to our own devices, we would create self-centered paradises, constructed from our convictions and fueled by our egocentrism.  But God, through his presence in others, interrupts our solipsism with his call upon us, his challenge for us, his shocking new word for us.

Times of personal and quiet reflection, whether in the beauty of nature or the stillness of our living rooms, are essential for our spiritual quest.  But they are not its meat and potatoes.  For that, we must encounter and interact with others.  And that is why we have a church.