A Leaf in the Stream

During my first year as a pastor, God showed me something that has helped me understand my place in what he’s doing in the world. It’s an image that I keep going back to, and I hope it’s one that you’ll find helpful as well.

I was the pastor of two churches in Armstrong County, and it was one of those weeks that pastors sometimes have. Nothing at the churches seemed to be going right, and people were pointing fingers at each other, and at me. I felt overwhelmed by the task in front of me, and I was frustrated by the difficulties that had cropped up. To clear my head and to seek God’s direction, I went for a walk in the woods. It was the fall, and I eventually ended up beside a little stream. As I stood there, stewing in my juices, my attention was drawn to a leaf floating down the stream: bouncing off the rocks, hurling over a little waterfall, getting caught in an eddy, and eventually floating downstream.

And then it hit me. Or, to word it more accurately, I realized what God was trying to tell me. He is the stream, and I am the leaf. I am caught up in something much larger than myself. Just as the current of the stream carried the leaf along, God’s Spirit carries me along in his plan. The leaf isn’t going to get downstream faster by doing anything on its own. The stream is in control of where it’s going, and God is in control of where I’m going and what I’m doing. The leaf has no idea where it’s going, or why it’s going there. But that doesn’t matter; it doesn’t need to. The stream will take care of things.

I am caught up in something bigger than me. It doesn’t all depend upon me to make things work out. God has a plan that is unfolding and carrying me along. I may not understand it, and I may not see where it is taking me. And that’s OK. I can relax in the stream that is carrying me along, and know that God is in control of it.

This image of being a leaf in the stream of God’s Spirit came to me again about three years ago, when I was devastated by the news that I would have to start work all over again on my PhD dissertation. Once again, I found myself standing beside a creek, watching the leaves float downstream. But this time, some of the leaves had ended up in a patch of still water away from the current of the stream. These leaves, for some reason, had ended up in a backwater that kept them from moving along. And I realized that, for reasons unknown to me, God wanted me to remain in the place where I was for a time before moving on. He wanted me to spend another year earning my degree.

Some people may be tempted to view this image as an excuse to be lazy and passive. Like an inert leaf, we just allow God to do his thing while we sit back and do nothing. But that’s not the message I’ve received. For me, it is a source of peace and hope. When I’m tempted to get anxious about how things are going, and to fret about the things I need to do in order to move things along, the image of a leaf in the stream reminds me of the truth. I am caught up in something bigger than me. God has a plan that is carrying me along. And I can trust him to carry me to his goal.

Cross-Cultural Faith

What did Christ do when he died for us? Your answer to this question may have more to do with the country you live in than you realize.

Freedom is important to us Americans. After all, we’re the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave. We celebrate the freedoms that our constitution guarantees. Our nation was born in a struggle for independence, and it grew through pioneers and settlers seeking a free life. Given the choice, we would rather live a difficult life of freedom than an easy life where we have to do what someone else tells us to do. So it’s no surprise that, as American Christians, we would almost instinctively answer the question “What did Christ do?” by replying “He freed us from our sins.” And without a doubt, he did.

I’ve learned from my time in Ghana that unity and belonging is very important to them. In Ghana, your very identity comes from your family, community, and ethnic group. I suspect that the typical Ghanaian would gladly sacrifice freedom in order to maintain strong relationships. One of the hardest things for Ghanaian immigrants in the US is the sense of isolation that they feel here. This value shows up in a common Ghanaian political slogan: “One Ghana!” They are proud of the fact that, in spite of tribal, religious, and political differences, unity matters. I’ve frequently seen Ghanaians strongly debate an issue that they disagreed over. After a while, one or both of them would get uncomfortable with this point of conflict and declare, “But we are brothers and sisters!” Smiles, handshakes, and jokes would then reassure them that, despite their difference of opinion, they are still in relationship with each other. So, unlike us Americans, a Ghanaian is more likely to say, “Because Christ died for me, I belong to him.” The work of Christ has given us a family and a kingdom to belong to.

Christ’s atoning work on the cross means both that he has set us free from sin, and also that we now belong to him. Our freedom in Christ is not an absolute independence that allows us to do anything we want. It means that we now have a Lord who controls our lives and unites us with him and with his family. And the fact that we belong to Christ means that we are no longer bound or enslaved by the evil forces of our world or the sin deep in our hearts.

The point here is not that either Americans or Ghanaians are “right” or “wrong.” The truth of Christ’s amazing work is greater than what any of us can grasp. But when we learn about how others understand our faith, we can enrich our own in the process.

It's Time to Step up

You’d have to live under a rock to be unaware of the budget battles in Washington, DC. One of the results is that our government is reducing its spending on social programs. Maybe you’re upset about these funding cuts, or perhaps you think they haven’t gone far enough. Either way, they’re making a change in our nation. And if you’re a Christian, you have a responsibility to act.

The testimony of Scripture is clear: we’re supposed to care for the those in need in our society. Read, for example, Psalm 82:3, Amos 5:11-13, Luke 18:18-30, and Romans 12:13. The Bible has much more to say about our responsibility to care for the poor and oppressed than it does about some of the issues which dominate many of our discussions.

Maybe you are someone who is disturbed by the government’s funding cuts because you believe that these programs fulfill the Biblical mandate. That’s fine, but there are other ways to be faithful to Scripture. What can you do, now that these programs aren’t doing it?

Or, maybe you’re someone who welcomes these cuts because you don’t think it’s not the government’s role to take care of people. Again, that’s fine. It may not be Washington’s job to help the poor, needy, and oppressed in our society, but Scripture tells us that it’s ours. Are you stepping up to the plate?

Regardless of your politics, the Christian call is clear. There are people in need. As the people of God, it is our responsibility to do something about it. What are you going to do? Here are a few suggestions:
1. Food banks across the nation are losing government funding for their work to feed the hungry. What can you do to assist our local food pantries, or the Pittsburgh Community Food Bank?
2. Volunteer fire departments are receiving smaller grants to support their work in our communities. Have you made a contribution to your local company?
3. FEMA has less money to help victims of natural disasters. The Presbyterian Disaster Assistance program has a proven track record of helping with long-term disaster recovery. Would you like to support them?
4. Public libraries have to make do with less, even though people with low incomes rely on them for so many things. Have you made a donation?
5. LIHEAP (Low Income Home Energy Assistance Program) has less money this winter to help people stay warm. Many of them will turn to the Lighthouse, our deacons, or other Christian charities for help. Can you give them more to work with?

These are just a few examples, but I hope you get my point. There are many ways that we can each do our part to obey God and help “the least of these” (Matthew 25:31-46) all around us.

The Spirit of Christmas, or the Spirit of Scrooge?

Scrooge is the enemy of the Christmas spirit. And he has taken over the holiday season. It’s time for us to fight back.

Ebenezer Scrooge, of course, is the villain of Charles Dickens’ holiday classic A Christmas Carol. In his greedy, miserly obsession with pinching every penny and maximizing the profit of his business, he ruined the lives of his tenants and clients, made life miserable for his clerk Bob Cratchit, and had no interest in relationships with his family or community. For Scrooge, Christmas was nothing but a nuisance that interfered with business and an excuse to fritter away money on charities and parties.

Today, the spirit of Scrooge looks a bit different. Instead of scowling “Bah, humbug!” in drab black clothing, it entices us with jingle bells and holly. But it is still focused on greed and on fattening the bottom line. The spirit of Scrooge has turned Christmas into a business venture. It perverts our holiday celebration by luring us away not only from its religious meaning but also from its secular sentiment. Scrooge has always been about making money, regardless of the human cost. And his spirit thrives today as we turn Christmas into an orgy of spending.

The original Scrooge was annoyed that Christmas interfered with his money-making. Today’s Scrooge is wiser; he sees Christmas as a way to make more money. He tells us that the holiday is about bringing joy to our loved ones through merchandise wrapped in pretty paper on Christmas day. The spirit of Scrooge has convinced us that the “proper” celebration of Christmas requires us to buy extravagant gifts for everyone we know, to outdo ourselves in decorating and baking. Make no mistake: behind the heart-warming Christmas commercials on television and the jolly music in the stores, there is a cynical spirit bent on putting as much money into its pockets as it can.

Perhaps my message bothers you. You may think that I’m being unpatriotic: aren’t we told that Christmas is good for the economy because so many companies depend on this end-of-the-year shot in the arm? You can use the same money that you would usually spend on gifts that end up in the back of someone’s closet for different purposes. If your money is spent by a food cupboard, a volunteer fire department, a homeless shelter, or a local library, it will stimulate the economy just as much as if it is used to buy tinsel and the latest hot toys or trendy fashion items.

Or, you may think that I’m criticizing the very spirit of the holiday. If you do, then Scrooge has won. If it “doesn’t seem like Christmas” without forking over money, you have bought the lie that Christmas can be bought in the mall, or that its joy comes with a budget. The spirit of Christmas comes not with a checkbook or a credit card, but with a heart that is open to our Lord and to the people around us.

This December, which spirit will you follow: Scrooge, or Christmas?

Peter

A Pastor-Congregation Covenant

When I came to Old Union Church (18 years ago in November), we established a covenant relationship between myself and the congregation, which included a series of mutual commitments to each other. Take a moment to review this covenant: am I honoring my commitments to you? Are you, as a member of the congregation, honoring yours?

Rev. de Vries: I will be diligent and hard-working.
Congregation: We will respect your need for personal and family time.

Rev. de Vries: I will prepare thought-provoking and faith-challenging sermons.
Congregation: We will provide you with preparation time, books and other resources, and continuing education.

Rev. de Vries: I will make emergency pastoral care my highest priority.
Congregation: We will inform you as quickly as possible about our needs for emergency pastoral care, such as hospitalization or death.

Rev. de Vries: I will provide leadership for the church, both personally and by supporting our lay leaders.
Congregation: We will recognize that our pastor is only one of several leaders for our church. With our elders and deacons, we will each assume our leadership responsibilities.

Rev. de Vries: I will strive continually to serve the congregation in the most appropriate ways.
Congregation: We, individually and through our Personnel Committee, will help you evaluate and set goals for your ministry.

Rev. de Vries: I will respect the traditions of the congregation, and will seek input from its members for future planning.
Congregation: We will consider your suggestions openly, and will participate in planning for the church's future.

Rev. de Vries: I will treat the manse with the same care I would use if it was my own house. I will keep the house and yard attractive.
Congregation: We will equip and maintain the manse in the same manner that we do our own homes. We will make repairs in a timely fashion.

Rev. de Vries: I will conduct my personal lifestyle as befits a disciple of Jesus Christ, as I best understand it.
Congregation: We will refrain from being overly critical or judgmental of you.

Rev. de Vries: I will receive constructive criticism openly, will strive to hear those comments non-defensively, and will take your concerns seriously.
Congregation: We will air concerns about you directly or through appropriate channels, rather than through gossip or other harmful means. We will present these concerns in a sensitive and constructive manner, with the goal of resolving any perceived problems.

All: We will all strive to bring glory to Jesus Christ through our relationship as pastor and congregation.

The Five R's of the Cross

At the its meeting in September, the Presbytery voted not to approve the request of a congregation to have someone serve as their next pastor. In 23 years, I’ve never seen this happen, and I can imagine how devastating it was for the church and the candidate. It’s not a decision that was made lightly, and was motivated primarily by the fact that he was unable to answer the question, “What difference does Jesus’ death on the cross make for humanity?” Various people tried to help him out by asking the question different ways, but it didn’t work. Because this is such a critical element of our faith, the Presbytery could not approve him to serve as a pastor. With that experience fresh in my mind, here’s the answer I’d give.

We are a broken and sinful people. We live in a world that perverts the goodness that God wants for us all. In spite of our best intentions, none of us are able to live lives that are pleasing to God because of our own selfishness, greed, pride, and willfulness. Left to our own devices, we destroy our relationship with a God who loves us. We wreak havoc upon other people, upon creation, and upon ourselves. The final destination of our lives would be misery and death.

But God’s love for us shines out in this bleak situation like a beacon in a storm. He loves us too much to allow us to destroy ourselves. So he came to us as Jesus Christ to give us life, hope, joy, and peace that would otherwise be impossible for us. And he did it through his death upon the cross.

There are many different explanations for what Jesus’ death actually accomplished. None of them tell the whole story, but each gives us an idea of how Jesus changed everything on the cross. On the cross, Christ became five R’s. Here’s a very simple explanation, and a brief Scripture reference, of each:

1. REDEEMER: Jesus paid the debt that we incurred with our sin. To put it another way, he took on the punishment that we deserved (Romans 3:21-26, 1 Peter 1:18-21).
2. RECONCILER: Jesus restored our relationship with God, and our relationships with each other, that we had demolished (2 Corinthians 5:16-21).
3. RESCUER: Jesus confronted and conquered the forces of evil that had enslaved us (Galatians 1:3-5).
4. RELATE-OR: By dying on the cross, Jesus endured the worst aspects of human experience. He can relate to the struggles and hardships we endure, because he went through it himself (Hebrews 2:17-18).
5. ROLE MODEL: Jesus shows us how we should live in the face of evil, and how we should offer ourselves up in love for one another. And he gives us the ability o do so (1 John 3:16-18).

Which of these “R”s touches your heart the most? Which one gives you something new to think about? And what answer will you give if someone asks you why Jesus died on the cross?

Peter

What Does the Bible Say About Marriage?

When I lead a series of premarital sessions with a couple whose wedding I’m about to perform, we spend time looking at what the Bible teaches about love and marriage. Something funny happens when we do this: the Bible doesn’t say what we think it says, or what we’ve been told that it says. While there are many passages in Scripture that describe love (both within the context of marriage and in other relationships), the two most significant passages that deal with marriage are Genesis 2, where we learn about the creation of the marriage relationship, and Ephesians 5, which describes the Christian concept of marriage. It’s important to keep in mind that these passages describe the ideal marriage. As long as we’re on this side of glory nothing is ideal, including our marriages. These passages describe the goal that Christian husbands and wives should work toward, but everyone should treat their partner with the grace that we all need as we seek to conform our lives to God’s desire for us.

GENESIS 2:18-25: When God created humanity, he created us to be in relationships. The Lord knew that it wasn’t good for Adam to be alone in the Garden of Eden; he needed a companion. Notice that God decided to make “a helper.” The marriage relationship isn’t simply about companionship and satisfying desires; it’s a practical matter. Husband and wife are to help and support each other in the work and calling that God has given them.

There were lots of animals with Adam in the Garden of Eden, but none of them fulfilled his need for companionship. First, the “livestock” are animals that we own; no one “owns” their spouse. In the ages before industrialization, internal combustion engines, and electricity, livestock were used to fulfill what people lacked: horses travel fast, oxen pull heavy loads, and so on. If you look to your spouse to fulfill what is missing in your life (physically or emotionally), your marriage is headed in the wrong direction. Second, the “birds of the air” are beautiful and enjoyable, with their bright feathers and pretty songs. If your attraction to your spouse is based solely on the pleasure you receive from them, or the physical attributes you enjoy about them, you have once again missed the mark of what marriage was created to be. And third, the “beasts of the field” were the animals that humanity was given authority over (Genesis 1:28). They are to be dominated and controlled, whether that means hunting or conserving. Neither husbands nor wives have been given that kind of role over each other.

When God created the first woman out of the first man, he made her from a rib. When I ask couples what a rib can represent or symbolize, they tell me that the rib offers protection for vital organs. It’s near the heart, which represents what we cherish the most. And it’s connected to your spine: the “backbone” of your life. I also point out to them that the rib is at your side, which is where spouses should be with each other. If God had used one of Adam’s toes to create the woman, she would be “under” him. If he had used Adam’s ear, the woman would be “above” him. But because she was made from the rib, husband and wife are meant to walk through life side by side, as companions.

The story of the creation of marriage ends with the comment that “the man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame.” There’s more to this statement than the fact that no one had to do laundry in the Garden of Eden. We wear clothing to hide our intimate parts. There are things we don’t want everyone to see, to avoid embarrassment and even ridicule. This is true not only for on-the-body clothing, but also for our emotional and spiritual “clothing.” We wear “masks” to hide the real us from the world around us. There are things about us that we don’t want everyone to know. We put on different appearances based on the people that we’re with. Our friends see one side of us, our co-workers another, and so on. But, ideally, it’s completely different with our spouses. We don’t need to hide ourselves from them. We can “let it all hang out,” because we know that we’re safe with them. They won’t take advantage of our vulnerability or make us feel awkward about who we are. They will cherish and respect the most vulnerable parts of our being. The ideal marriage relationship is one of openness and trust; you don’t have to protect yourself from your spouse because they will do their best to care for and protect you.

EPHESIANS 5:21-33: This section of Paul’s letter to Ephesus begins a description of how Christians should relate to each other. It was common in that time to describe relationships as pairs between “superiors” and “inferiors:” husbands and wives, parents and children, masters and slaves. Paul borrowed this concept from his contemporaries and gave it a Christian twist. In so doing, he undermined the conventional understanding of power relationships. Instead of describing how some people have authority over others, he begins the section with a simple but challenging statement: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” None of us have, or should have, power over others. We are all called to submit, or to open up our lives, to each other as an expression of our devotion to Christ.

Many people focus upon verse 22 of this passage: “Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord.” For centuries, this verse has been used to justify the domination and even abuse of husbands over wives. The wife is supposed to do whatever the husband requires of her. He has authority over her, and her job is to obey whatever he tells her to do. And the passage goes on to compare the relationship between husband and wife to our relationship with Christ. Just as we call Christ our Lord and submit our lives to his will, wives are to follow their husbands. If Paul’s description of the marriage relationship ended at verse 24, it would be a very one-sided relationship; husbands are in charge and wives must do whatever they tell them to do.

But Paul goes on to describe the husband’s obligation to his wife. The husband is to love his wife the same way that Christ loved the church. Christ lived out his love for us by dying for us. Therefore, husbands ought to lay their lives down for their wives. Giving up your life for your wife means more than doing heroic things like catching a bullet for he, or putting yourself in harm’s way to protect her. These are the easier ways to “give yourself up” for your wife, because they’re splashy, one-time events. It’s much harder, and much more important, for husbands to lay down their lives for their wives through the regular events of life. The husband gets up from the couch to answer the phone so that his wife can relax. The husband foregoes the piece of sports equipment he had his eye on so that there’s money for his wife to get what she wants. The husband wakes up in the middle of the night to change the baby’s diaper so his wife can sleep. These are a few examples of the everyday ways in which a husband is to “give himself up” for his wife.

When Paul compares the husband’s headship over his wife with Christ’s headship over the church, he encourages us to consider the kind of a leader Christ is for us. He is not a taskmaster, demanding that we diminish our own lives for his benefit. To the contrary: Christ emptied himself of his very life so that our lives will be blessed. Christ calls us to “servant leadership,” which is a very different model from what most leaders in our world follow. If the husband is the leader of his wife, he is a leader who sacrifices himself for her welfare.

To make sure that we understand his counter-cultural message, Paul evokes the image from Genesis 2 of how the woman was made from the man’s rib. The wife is part of the husband’s body. For a husband to mistreat or fail to care for his wife is tantamount to abusing and neglecting his own body. If we are emotionally healthy, we don’t take pleasure in bashing in our kneecaps and dislocating our fingers. We tend to our aches and pains, and make sure that we get enough to eat. The instinctual ways in which we care for our bodies is a model for how husbands should care for their wives.

Paul describes the ideal Christian marriage as a relationship in which each partner puts their spouses welfare above their own. It’s easy for a wife to submit to a husband whose chief goal in life is to do lay his life down for her. And it’s simple for a husband to lay down his life for a wife who respects and honors him. The mutual relationship of self-giving is summed up in Paul’s introduction to the topic: “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.” When your spouse’s top priority in the marriage is to do what’s best for you, you don’t need to stand up for your rights to get what you deserve: he or she is doing it for you already. And your spouse doesn’t need to advocate for his or her welfare, because you’re already doing it for him or her. In this way, a marriage is not a battleground between two wills, vying to get what they want. Instead, it becomes a place where spouses delight in taking care of each other.

Keep in mind, however, that this is the description of an ideal Christian marriage. No earthly marriage is made up of perfect people. Our own willfulness and selfishness is always present, undermining our attempts at trust and support. We will fail to place our spouse’s welfare ahead of our own. The goal is one that is always before us. And the ideal becomes a nightmare in one-sided marriages: when one spouse is “naked” and submits to the other, while the other spouse is guarded and selfish. Instead, as husband and wife strive to get closer to this ideal, and forgive each other when they fail, they share a marriage that honors God and blesses each of them.